The Vows We Break by Briana Cole

Author:Briana Cole
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Kensington Books
Published: 2019-05-28T16:00:00+00:00

Chapter 16

I heard the knock, loud and clear, but I still didn’t bother to answer. This early in the morning, it could only be one of my parents on the other side of the door, and I figured maybe if I pretended to be asleep they would go away.

I really wasn’t in the mood for conversation now. They hadn’t bothered asking me questions when I showed up at their house last week, bag and baby in hand.

I’m sure they had been trying to mask their excitement I was moving back in, because now they could spoil their grandbaby. Never mind the fact that Jahmad had just kicked us out and had discovered, quite possibly, my child wasn’t his. Never mind the depression that seemed to settle on me, thick and suffocating, so that all I had the energy to do was drag myself between the bathroom and the bed.

I had called Jahmad so many times he had blocked me and I hadn’t even bothered leaving messages anymore. I’m sure he received all thirty-four of them along with the twenty-seven text messages. What probably pained me even more was that he had basically written JayJay off. No type of communication to see if he was doing okay. It was as if those results had hardened his heart, and any connection with my son was a connection to me, which he had made it good and clear he didn’t want. He hadn’t even let me explain. He hadn’t even let me tell him the test was fake, at least that’s still what I was hoping, and I had gotten a real one done with true results on the way. And the checks, well, I had done it for Jamaal, slowly building up his little savings account. Couldn’t he see it wasn’t about me? Or did he not care at that point?

Then, and I had to admit this was what really ripped at my heart, was Jahmad just making an excuse? He had given up Texas for us, for our family, but had he been looking for a reason so he could still go? Maybe it wasn’t even me at all like I was beating myself up for. Maybe it was CeeCee. Jamaal and I were just collateral damage.

So now my child was without a father. And I couldn’t lie, I was in no better shape myself as his mother; I might as well have been just as absent. I was fortunate my parents loved on him so much I’m sure he didn’t even have time to register my absence. In my condition, that was probably a good thing.

The knock came again, gentle but persistent, and I finally mustered enough strength to pull myself from the pillows. The sweaty t-shirt and oversize sweat pants were now on their fourth day of wear and by the slight smell, were obviously overdue for a wash. Squeezed in my tiny bedroom was not only my stuff but Jamaal’s, and we had officially taken over the rest of the house as well with toys and baby essentials cluttering the floor and furniture.

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